Ross's Report

After the mullering of last week it was important that the Inter Macc Mavericks didn't get complacent. This was more so important with keeper Chris Chantler away on international duty and Paul Hamer failing a last minute fitness test. Having taking some verbal abuse heading onto the pitch the Mavericks simply rose above the mind game attempts and focused on getting the job done. The team made new boys Joe McDonald and Sean "B" Helsby feel welcome at once aswell as Tom Cooney playing for the second week in a row, sparking press speculation at the move becoming a permanent one. Despite pictures of Tim Leah appearing in the tabloids partying till the early hours of this morning, he made a third start under manager Ross Helsby, who seems to have tamed the wild party animal.
From kick off it seemed that the game was in balance and could go either way however, within minutes the Mavericks were stroking the ball around, creating a bright and vivid work of art on the canvas that is Hazel Grove sports hall. The Jedi's were most certainly not "using the force" as all they could do was watch the ball be knocked around like Audley Harrisson. 
From the back 'The General' Joe McDonald rose to the challenge after the manager addressed a few confidence issues pre-match. He started every move and was always an option for the pass as well as proving more difficult to pass that airport customs with a liquid greater than 250ml in volume. Tim Leah played the supporting role for McDonald and did so in style. He may not be the most comfortable on the ball but he was not afraid to play a bit of football at times and made toast of Warburton several times. The unchanged midfield maestros of Chaz McD and R. Helsby gave more of the same this week providing consistency, craftmanship and stability. They helped keep the ball for lengthy periods and grabbed a goal a piece to show for their work as well as handfulls of assists for those who wisely selected these two in their fantasy football teams. Dan Wild made his return under manager R. Helsby, who just seems able to get the most out of this young child prodigy. He danced around the floor with the ball sticking to his feet, proving almost impossible to tackle he was a strong as the smell of sour grapes coming from Daz's van. Tom Cooney was brought in to fill in for Pauline Hamer and he showed why he is every bit as good as Gary Megson says he is. Taking on defenders, finding the right passes and chasing down every ball possible, he worked tirelessly for his team mates and reaped a five goal reward. Sean Helsby in net was doubted by opposition manager Darren Provost and he proved him wrong in untimely fashion. He flew with the greatest of ease and despite a few deflections and questionable technique he put on a display to be proud of. He had the opposition fans throwing coins at him in frustration.
The football tonight was simply sensational. Unfortunatley it was not reciprocated by the opposition. The cameras picked up footage of Kyle Mulliner shouting unsavoury expletives into defender Joe McDonalds face. Hopefully the FA will treat this as harshly as the Luis Suarez case and Mulliner will be looking at a lengthy ban. The sportsmanship of the opposition was called into question tonight as several bad tackles were committed on the players everyone is dubbing 'The Very Purity of Football'. They showed real maturity and got on with their game tonight. The fans got their moneysworth once again in a game that everyone will be talking about fo decades...

COMPLETE RUBBISH AND SCAFFOLDING IS ALREADY UP FOR THE PREPERATIONS OF MAKING HAZEL GROVE GYM LARGER FOR ROSS HELSBYS HEAD..... SIGNED... WARBURTON